The best thing I've seen all week!

Yesterday, I sat in the front office of a local school during dismissal.  It was a very busy, yet well-organized process.  A student entered the office and asked to use the phone.  I watched intently as one of the staff members assisted him.  She was absolutely fantastic!  She knew the child by name and asked why he wasn't heading to practice.  The child told her that his dad told him not to go to practice because he needed to pick him up early.  The child was clearly frustrated because his dad wasn't in the parking lot and he was missing practice!

The woman slid the phone across the counter and watched him as he dialed.  The student tried to dial the number twice with no luck.  At this point, many adults would have said, "Here.  Let me dial it for you."  Instead, she gently asked, "Is it long distance?"

He nodded and tried to dial again.  She continued to stand back and let him try and try again.  After two or three more unsuccessful attempts, she calmly stated with a smile, "You might need to dial a one first."

He tried two more times. Still no success and he was getting frustrated.  By this time, very few adults would lend more guidance.  Most would take over and do it for him.  Some might actually say, "I can't believe you don't know how to dial a phone!"

Instead, she respectfully and politely tried to guide him through the dialing process.  With this last attempt, it still did not work for him, so she did ask him if he wanted her to dial it for him.  I love that she did not TELL him she would do it.  The choice was his.  

He accepted her offer and the call was made.  This fine educator never lost sight of the fact that this was a child learning how to do something.  She never lost her cool or placed an unreasonable expectation on him.  Sure, we think that all kids should be able to dial a phone number, but in reality, most of us simple tap a name on our cell phones to call anyone these days.  This child walked in frustrated, tried out an unpolished skill several times unsuccessfully, felt the love and guidance of a teacher, and walked out feeling better than when he entered the office!  I do not know her name but I was thoroughly impressed!

Two Steps Forward

Last year, around this time, I was gearing up for my big New Year's Resolution.  I was determined to eat better, lose a few pounds and make exercise a habit again!  I know...I shared this resolution with about 200 million other people in this country!  I resolved to start this on January 2nd because there is always leftover pie on January 1st!

So on January 2nd, I really worked hard to make it happen.  I started off great!  Through January and February, I ate more vegetables and less bread.  I stopped going back for a second helping at every meal.  I started going on some long walks and even ran a bit.  I did push-ups and pull-ups and other exercises that can easily be done at home and in the office.  By the end of February, I had lost about 20 pounds and I was feeling good!  I had established a few new habits that were working for me!

On February 28th, a friend asked me if I could play for his indoor soccer team because they were missing a few players.  I eagerly agreed and played pretty well.  It was a blast!  With about three minutes left in the game, I was chasing down a ball that was heading towards our goal, I flipped the ball against the wall to my right, then cut left.  Unfortunately, my knee cut right, and POP.

I tore my ACL.  I knew it.  I limped off the field, and grabbed some ice.  A few days later, the doc confirmed my injury and scheduled surgery for March 20th.  What a downer!  For the first time in quite a few years, I had made a resolution that actually stuck!  It stuck because I chose a few easy habits that I could actually maintain.  The question became, would I be able to keep up with my new routines through the six month recovery period?

Post surgery included  massive back pain and a nasty hematoma under one of my incisions.  Six months turned into eight months.  A few months into rehab, I felt like I had failed to maintain my new habits.  I wasn't focused on the veggies as much and there was really no way to get my exercise with a bum knee.

What's the point?

Looking back now, I realize that I didn't exactly fail.  I may have missed days (or weeks) but the general habits are still there.  Missing one day or week does not mean that I destroyed my resolution.  It does not mean I broke the good habit and I need to start from scratch.  It doesn't mean that I need to wait until the next January first to begin again.  A habit is not broken so easily, especially if my resolve to keep it is strong!  "Two steps forward, one step back" is still progress!

Just a Setback

How do you deal with a setback?  What happens when success is right around the corner, then an unforeseen barrier is thrown in the way?  It could be the weather, a grumpy teammate, or a new rule.  How do you handle it?  How long do you let the setback stay in your way?

Regardless of the size of the barrier, it is perfectly OK to feel the natural disappointment or frustration.  Let it soak in, but do not let it swallow you!  As soon as you are able, remind yourself of your goal, assess your new situation, make a new plan of action, then forge on!  Remember, the best dances are two steps forward and one step back!